Friday, December 27, 2013

Anybody got a flamethrower?

It seems my idea of melting the white shite and ice isn't as popular as I thought. It sounded perfectly sane to me. Obtain a flame thrower and blast the patio. It's made of stone so wouldn't burn. Alas, there is not one to be found in this town. It's alright for CT to stock semi-automatics but flamethrowers, noooooo. ~sigh~

So I spent a few hours hacking away at the landing and finally cleared it. Mind you I'll have to re-stain in spring due to the scraping away of the top coat and maybe a few, ummm, grooves will need to be filled. But I was going to do that anyways, yep, I'll stick with that reasoning and remember how they came to be in May.

Next came clearing of the patio itself. After I made it past the bottom step I realized it just wasn't built up white shite. Lets see, we've had so much of everything in the past week; last Saturday after a foot fell, I scurried out and cleared it off, creating a path to the composters while I was at it. Overnight it froze rain for hours, then snowed all day Sunday. See where I'm going?

Monday eve went out after more freezing rain and like a certain entity, literally walked on water, mind you it was frozen but yes I too walked on it. It's layer upon layer of snow, an inch of ice, snow, 3 inches of ice, and more snow lovingly delivered yesterday. It made me look at the sky and cry out “Santa, I was such a good girl all year long, why???” Perhaps I'll go to hell in a handcart next year and see what he brings me. Maybe a shiny, new flamethrower?

After a few hours I called it a day, not quite finished but will do for now. The chair was released from its icy prison, mitts were soaked from throwing hunks of ice and the birds were becoming verbally cranky because I, their host, the one who spends good money on seed and ensures the feeder is always full, was toiling away and they vanted to be left alone to eat.

Sitting in the wet chair looking at the chunks, I thought those would make a mighty fine igloo. Solid and flat, easy to carve, and not about to melt anytime soon. Me thinks I just may have a weekend project. Perhaps a few small ones to provide homes for the squirrels and Pooka. Then again it sounds like a lot of work in the wet and cold and I've had enough of this, merci very much. Anybody got a flamethrower? 


  1. Ya nut! Mines not working or I'd lend it to you

  2. Gather up all those miscellaneous whiskey bottles that still have an inch or less in them, take a swig, pour it on the ice and light it. Not as fun as a flame thrower maybe, but still fun. And of course, try it with the first bottle before wasting the rest. Assuming a lot here, I know.

    1. I wonder if it would work the same with Merlot or Beaujolais but I'll give it a try. Thanks for the suggestion !

  3. Hate the white shite. My wretched family leave it to me to shift it, but I rebelled this weekend, consequently, my drive is in the same shape as your patio. Do post pictures of your squirrel igloos.

  4. Isn't that always the way Pea. Good news is it's thawing so the poor squirrels might have been a tad cranky if they had fallen on them

  5. Yea...I wish I had thought of the flame thrower has been an awful winter so far..stay broken bones..Michelle

  6. Will do Michelle, you tooooooooo


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